Firstly, sorry for the voice over... I was experimenting. Though it helps the narrative in terms of understanding, it also doesn't quite fit.
Though we agreed that the first two scenes with my younger brothers are up to our standards, we didn't like the other two scenes and have decided to re-shoot them.
Why didn't they work? Personally, I think it's the lack of interesting and thought-out camera angles. The angles used aren't particularly exciting and also the match-on-action doesn't match up for some of the shots. Especially for the last scene, we rushed it and consistently looked at our scripts. This was hard for me to edit around and evidently made the film look very untidy.
The last scene also has a completely different feel to the rest of the movie. It's quite off putting, as the complete change in tempo is so sudden, and not in a good way. I think when we re-film it, we should change the 3rd scene slightly. Make it brighter and perhaps even change the story because with the rewrite of the ending we need to change some things. For example, it doesn't make sense that he would make his own girlfriend leave him. Unless of course it's justified, in which case we would need to also explain that in the next scene.
Speaking of the girlfriend, she shouldn't leave him through skype. It doesn't look good on camera, and is far to unemotional. We also made it unclear with the actual dialogue that it was a break-up, hence why I did the voice over.
-BW
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